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The funny world according to 911


The funny world according to 911

What three things must you have on the road with you?

Spike: A bigcrate of chips, beans 'n' eggs, my PlayStation and... (breaking into a dirty laugh) a gorgeous bird.

Lee: Fan letters, a Dictaphone to record Jimmy and Spikes 'antics', and eye drops.

Jimmy: Playstation, ghettoblaster and me mum to do the washing.

What item of clothing should never ever ve worn?

L: Clogs, I used to tap dance in a bright red pair when I was seven.

S: Sandals 'cause they show off your come and hairy toes.

J: Tank tops. Me mum used to make me wear a browny-green checkered one.

Describe the best kind of kiss.

J: Soft and slow.

L: A full on saucy one with tongues.

S: Any kind os kiss'll do me.

What's the 911 motto?

L: Have a laugh and be mad.

J: Be happy and enjoy life.

S: Get in as much trouble as you can---and get away with it!

What hurts you?

J: When people make out 911 are big-headed and slag us off behind our backs.

S: People supporting Liverpool FC. (Spike's a man Utd fan)

L: Broken promises. When I played football the coach would promise I'd be on the team and then not let me play.

What's the best word or phrase in the world?

L: 'Get in there'. I use it if something brilliant happens, like when we reach No.1!

J: 'Sound'

S: 'Top' or "Aye up'.

Give each other a bit of advice...

J: Spike, slow down when you eat---no one's gonna nick your dinner. And Lee---don't be so fussy about your food.

L: Spike, learn the words to our ---you're always too busy to reading the banners. And Jimmy---less of your slime, mate!

S: Lee---practice your bodyshaking and Jimmy---practice being messy please. You're too tidy, mate.

What's the right age to start acting like a grown up?

J: When you feel right.

L: When you have babies and that.

S: There's no 'right age'. I'll never grow up!

Which part of your body do you always keep covered up?

S: My ding-a-ling!

J: My chest. I don't like that chect-showing business.

L: My feet. I've got things that look like corns on my toes. They're not real corns though, it's where my shoes rub.

What would you put in a time capsule to teach people of the future about 911?

L: A foreign plug. I always carry one with me.

J: Room service menus, a phone and photos of all the women we know---ie none!

S: An airplane sick bag, a tin of beans and a garden gnome 'cause we're the smallest band in pop!